Carpooling...

We are one week into our new routine with the girls going to their private school.  We've worked out the kinks in getting everyone where they need to be - all at the same time - and the girls have settled in nicely, making new school friends and learning the ropes.  There have been a few speed bumps during our transition, but we are patient in handling everything coming our way.

Sierra still acts as if I'm dropping her off at prison each morning and does her best to make me feel bad for leaving her there, giving me a lifeless wave as she watches me drive away. I know she's making friends and having fun, she just doesn't want me to know. It's been interesting to watch her thaw and warm-up to some of the sweet kids in her classes who are extending their hands, welcoming her.  

Audra jumped right in with her usual first-born bravery and has been very accepting of her new environment. She tried out for and made the Jr. High softball team, so she has an instant group of girls whom she will get to know right away. I think we are really going to like her coach, who has the character qualities and the skill development ability that we've been praying for, when it comes to school ball, which is usually so hit-or-miss when it comes to who the coach is.  We are happy and looking forward to the season.

As much as we investigated, spoke to people and checked references about our new school, we find ourselves completely unprepared for, what seems to be, a major component of being in the new school......carpooling. We'd not heard mention of the word in our interview process, but now that we are in, we are surrounded by people who want to carpool, need to carpool and are not shy about asking us to carpool.  

We are feeling a bit stifled by everyone's carpooling good intentions, we just aren't carpoolers. We've got four kids, for goodness sake, we have our own carpool. 

Yesterday, I got a call from a woman whom I do not know.  Somehow, she knew that we lived one mile from each other, went to the same school and was overenthusiastic about carpool possibilities.  She kept using that term, carpool possibilities, as if talking about it enough would make me want to jump on-board. When I explained that our daughters did not get picked up at the same time and it was not always me who did the picking up, she retreated and said I should just keep her number - for carpool possibilities.  About 30 minutes later, as I was making dinner, the phone rang again. It was her. She said that she had given it some thought and her son is also playing on a sports team at the school and if I didn't mind waiting an extra 15 minutes after Audra's practice, he could carpool home with me. Doesn't that defeat the purpose of the carpool? 15 minutes is what it takes me to get to school. I wasn't completely clear on her logic there, but she sounded convinced that it was all going to work out just fine. I'm not sure I said anything, but remember hanging up the phone with my mouth wide open.  

After dinner, I got an e-mail from the nice carpool lady who basically said, here is my cell #, my husband's cell #, the kids' emergency cell # and our home phone. She signed it, appropriately, looking forward to carpool possibilities. I have not yet responded. 

Audra had a softball team-building party after practice last night. I met the mom on Friday, who was hosting the party, and she gave us all directions to her house.  She also said that her and another mom were available to drive the team after practice and we could just pick them up at her house after 7:00 sometime.  So, I phoned her yesterday to make sure she had room for Audra and offered to drive if her car was full. She assured me that she could take 7 girls and so could the other mom, so it was not a problem.  I spoke to Audra on the phone before practice and told her who's mom was taking her and that I would pick her up after.

When I got to the team-building party to pick her up, everyone looked like they were having a great time. On the way home, Audra spoke to me about one of her concerns being at the new school......carpooling. (She did not know that I had a day filled with carpooling pressure.) She told me that the mom came to practice and girls just started throwing their stuff into the back. When she went to get in, all the seats were taken. She told the mom, "My mom called ahead and told me you offered to take me. I'm Audra."  Finally, after some uncomfortable silence, Audra found a seat when someone left to ride in the other car.

She looked at me and said, "I don't want to be a carpooler with people I don't know. Everyone wants to talk about where we live and who has the carpool in our neighborhood. When they ask me which carpool I'm in, I just tell them that you drive me. Can you please keep driving me?"

We got a big laugh out of the similarities in our day.  I'm sure there are lots of great carpoolers and I'm sure carpooling is of value to lots of people. For us, our family enjoys the special time together in the car going to and from school. Some of our best conversations happen in the car. I don't mind the drive and I look forward to hearing my kids prepare for and download their day.  

We may be in at the new school, but we are definitely out of the carpool.