Tuesday, July 28, 2009 at 03:54PM I remember when My Space became the rage. I was cautious, critical and disenchanted with the whole social networking thing and the theories people gave to support it. I did not bite. To this day, I have never been on My Space and I continue to be cautious of internet-based social networking sites.
When I gave legs to the idea of writing an internet blog, that was way out there for me. I had, and still have, some trepidation about the intimacies of my life being so accessible to so many. But, in the end, I decided to just give the blog a go and take it day by day. At least it was an avenue which almost forces me to write everyday, which is one of the things I truly love to do. Thanks for reading!
Then came Facebook. Again, I did not bite. Heck, I didn't even text or know how to text on my cell phone until about six months ago. It's not that I'm not savvy about technology. (Well, I'm not. But that's not my point.) I guess I just like things the old way. I still like to write checks, which prompts my husband to call me his 80's lady. I write checks out of my old fashioned check book as often as I can and I still write the occasional letter, with a pen.
Some months ago, a Christian friend of mine suggested I get on her Facebook page to view her family photos. "You have a Facebook page?" I asked incredulously.
"Yes, it's great! My parents have a facebook page, too and it helps us stay connected from so far away." She told me.
Wow, I'm really not very hip at all. I spoke with some other people about Facebook and found out that, apparently, there are more rules for the site which keeps it safe. I'm not sure how internet rules work or how they keep me safe, but I feel better hearing it.
So, she sent me the link and I bravely "went there" to view her photos. Uh-oh - seems I had to log on as a Facebook member just to view her site. I logged off. "I don't want to be a member, " I whined to my husband.
"Why not?" He asked. "Is there anything wrong with it? If you would go there to look at her photos, why wouldn't you be okay logging in?"
He's always so logical, in his own unique way. Bravely, I logged back on and "went there." I set up my account so that I could just view her page. I put down as little info as possible. Once I got all set up, I could not figure out how to find her page. I felt like a moron. After several frustrating attempts, I logged off and figured I'd live without seeing her pictures.
Within minutes, I kid you not, my e-mail pinged with people on Facebook who wanted to be "friends." So-and-so wants to be your friend on Facebook. "I don't have time for my real friends," I told my husband, "let alone Facebook friends."
He just looked at me with that 80's lady look on his face.
Slowly, I've answered my Facebook friends' requests and have even written on their walls, whatever that means. When my Grandma Della, in her 80's, invited me to be her friend on Facebook, I knew I must be a little behind the times. I think I've got 15 people who've asked me to be their Facebook friend and I'm not at all sure why, because I don't "talk" to them. (They must be okay having a dud for a friend.) I did hear from a friend that there are some people who try to get as many friends as possible on Facebook. Friend envy, it sounds like and I'm not going there. I've not gotten up the courage (or the time) to build my own profile yet or invite people to be my friend. I'm happy with my real-life friends, whom I don't get to talk to or see enough as it is.
Now that I've been a visitor on Facebook for a little while, the people who manage the site keep suggesting that I post a photo of myself, which would appear next to my name. Right now, all that comes up is a generic blue Facebook head. I recognize myself right away because everyone else has their real face there. I'm still not sure that I want to be on Facebook and if I put a photo there, I'm committed - I'd be in.
Another friend told me after church the other day that I could link my Facebook page on my blog and visa versa. Hmmm, that did sound interesting. The jury is still out for me on Facebook. I have enjoyed seeing little snip-its from old friends in CA but have not jumped in with both feet. I suppose, when I get rid of the blue head and actually post a real photo, I'll be completely in and will link it to my blog. If anyone has any feedback for this 80's lady on the pros and cons of Facebook, my little blue Facebook head is all ears.
Reader Comments (4)
Sheila,
Now that you have caved on the Facebook issue, I could be the last of the Mohicans! Like you, I successfully skirted the My Space craze and have resisted Facebook up to this point. However, just like you, I have recently been asked by several friends and family members to get on Facebook and view some of their pictures. I thought it sounded like a cool idea so I went on and tried to view their photos, only to receive the same message you did…….that I needed to become a Facebook member before I could view the pictures on their sites. I promptly logged off and haven’t been back. Now that you have become a Facebook groupie, I am counting on you to keep me informed as to how your experience is going before I make the decision to join in.
You and I seem to be quite similar in how we view the latest and greatest technological advances that come down the pike and how we prefer things “the old way”. Cell phones had been out for years before I finally broke down and purchased one, and then only because the “powers to be” mentioned that it would be quite acceptable to them if they could have immediate and 24-hour-a-day access to me, since I was running their company. I reluctantly agreed to purchase a cell phone and, within weeks, couldn’t figure out how I ever got by without one. Concerning texting, I have to say that I beat you to that one by a couple of months, but only after some subtle pressure from my wife, children, co-workers, and a good friend. Can’t say I have fallen in love with the texting process yet, but at least I know how to capitalize words and use the proper punctuation now (which apparently doesn’t matter when you are texting).
Paying bills by check is still my bag, which keeps me acutely aware of my monthly living expenses and helps keep the US postal service in business. To top it all off, I actually still carry enough cash with me to pay for stuff from time to time (when ease or necessity warrants it), and my bank teller likes to wink at me a couple times a month so I have never used an ATM. Lastly, when those special situations or occasions in life call for a gift of kindness, compassion, empathy or love, how much of any of these can really be passed along in an email, text, or tweet (the final step to madness)? Not much, in my experience. On the other hand, a handwritten note from someone you care about can touch your heart and soul for years to come. So, if you are Wade’s 80’s lady, I’m his 70’s guy.
Oh, by the way, do you know where I can purchase the most advanced cassette player? My 8-track player is beginning to eat my tapes so I am in need of a serious technology upgrade for my favorite music. Randall
I am sure you are the last of the Mohicans, Randall, and I think it's a good thing. There's a fine line we walk being in the world but not of the world, which is why I think I gravitate to the old ways. Sometimes all of the technology we have to take us places is not necessarily leading us where we are designed to go.
We'd probably be happy riding along in a horse-drawn carriage, cooking meat that we caught with spears over an open fire. Well, maybe that's a little too old fashioned. Anyway, I'm glad to hear that others have some of the same feelings about the social networking crazes that I do. Makes me feel normal.
Love all your comments on this blog - you are good! I have similar issues with tapes. I have a small collection of cassette tapes, but no way to play them. Walked by a record player in an antique store recently and the kids did not know what it was. I felt like I should have been walking with a cane.
This morning they asked me what year I was born. When I told them, the little one said, "You are old."
Thanks for checking in to make my day - your comments are always good for some laughs. Take care and don't cave on the "old ways" of doing things. We'll need to stick together on this one! I'll keep you posted on my Facebook journey. The jury is still out...
I am also one of the last standing without a facebook or myspace page. Maybe I am stuck in the past but my time is so valuable, and I value others time, that I when I choose to spend time with family and friends I like to do it face to face. At a minimum I like to hear their voices. I am much more a social than a social network kind of guy. As you know I like to talk and the facebook/myspace type of contact would just frustrate me and would not allow me to get all the words out I need. I know you have "caved in" a bit but I would encourage you to stand strong as long as possible, it is getting lonely out here. LOL. Good Luck with your decision.
It's good to hear that you, too, are a social networking holdout, Coach Louie. I guess I'm surprised only because you have a high schooler and the teens seem to be the ones networking. I am grateful that my kids remain uninterested. I am with you on the value of time and even to sit and blog every day takes me away from people. I enjoy writing and try to do it when others are engaged in their own activities. Moderation. I, too, prefer the face-to-face exchanges with people and, as you know, love to talk, listen and share. I do admit that the occasional text comes in handy when pinched for time.
Thanks for your feedback on my Facebook dilemma. I feel much better hearing from others that they're feeling as I do. Always great to get your comments! When are you going to start your blog? Hope to talk to you soon...